Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
Randomize
