i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
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