butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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