I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
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