So drunk its hurt
I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
