You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
Randomize
