u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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