so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize
