Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
tell your sister to shave her snatch
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
Randomize
