Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
Randomize