life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
Randomize
