You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
Randomize
