I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
I know her cup size but not her name....
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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