covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
Randomize
