So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
