I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
Randomize
