you said youd get me home safely, you dropped me off at 9:30 last night and i just woke up on my porch.
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize
