He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
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