New low: just hacked my moms facebook
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
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