just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
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