I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
Randomize
