My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
