Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
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