no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
Randomize