so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
Randomize
