what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
Randomize
