I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
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