3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
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