youre lurking in front of me
Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
What the hell happened to my hand?
Well, you got in a fight with a cabbie while jaywalking, but we got you to walk away. The problem was 80 blocks away, when you punched a parked taxi for "running you over".
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
Randomize
