Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
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