Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
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