hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Btw I puked in your glovebox
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize
