I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Don't stress. That was a joke. I'd trust my pets with no one else. Accidents happen. Sometimes things go smoothly when you help a neighbor out and sometimes you electrocute their fish. Life is funny that way.
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
Randomize
