weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
Randomize
