Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
Randomize
