Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Randomize
