He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
me + whiskey = a bad person
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Randomize
