hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
Randomize
