I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
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