I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize
