Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
Over Bumbled last night. I think I set my dog up on a date Sunday afternoon. I have to drive him, meet the other dog’s dad and secretly drink a bottle of champagne from a “water bottle”. This is not what I expected 30 to be like.
Randomize
