And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
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