All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
Hey, scratch that. I've shit 8 times today. I don't have the energy to get laid so I cancelled my date.
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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