I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
I'm getting married
To pizza
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
I made him laugh his dick is mine
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
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