I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
Randomize
