you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
I yelled at your uterus for you.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
