fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
Randomize
