My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
Randomize
