I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
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