My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
I can't try on my wedding dress because someone is trying to commit suicide in the store. Is this a sign?
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
She needs sedatives and a leash
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
They left me at home... I'm a liability
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
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