ugly people sure do ruin things
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
We have an albino peacock in our apartment. It's beautiful.
Scratch it being beautiful, bitch just stole my McDonalds. Call animal control.
Randomize
