Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
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